mrsjono

It's been 2 months since I was really here. I've been here a couple of times over the past 2 months trying to post something but I never seem to hit the 'Publish Post' orange button. I have a number of drafts that sound like trash to me and they eventually get deleted away. I just can't pen down thoughts that have been swimming around in my head and bring my message across. What the hell is wrong with me?

It's 4 months into the job now. How am I doing? I think I'm veering off course. I've been making more and more mistakes by the day. I dwell on each mistake I made and worry about not being able to rectify it. Typical me. I start to question the purpose of doing what I'm doing everyday. Am I just going through the motion and doing something for the sake of doing? Yes. I can't seem to remember the things I've done. My mind is a total blank. I stump when asked questions. Am I learning new things everyday? No. Am I wasting my time? Yes. So what should I do next? Good question.

Policies need to be reviewed from time to time. Similarly, we need to pause, take a step back and reflect on our actions when we feel life is going downhill. Think of the possible implications before committing to an answer. When A asks B to do something and B asks me to do it, clarify with A. Stop following instructions blindly. Find out the purpose or rationale behind every request or instruction given. Predict the next move. Initiate changes. Suggest alternatives. The list goes on.

If you know me, I'm a pessimist. The glass is always half-empty. It's sunset and not sunrise at the horizon. I get chided by rs when I tell him to "look at the bright side" or "stop thinking about all the bad things" when things are not going well for him. Why? He says I'm in no position to say that when I can't do it myself. I never really figured out how to think positively. I seldom receive words of consolation or encouragement when I make mistakes or screw up. So I'm going to console myself that it's ok to make mistakes now when I'm still new. Everyone makes mistakes. If I don't make mistakes, I will not learn and grow.

A colleague once said "I psycho myself alot to continue staying in a job." I start to find this statement true...

Free gift: Free is redundant because all gifts are, by definition, free.

ATM machine & PIN number: Similarly, 'machine' and 'number' are redundant. ATM already stands for Automated Teller Machine and PIN for Personal Identification Number. Same goes for J corporation, the organization I'm at now. I guess the last word is repeated to give people an idea of what the abbreviation/acronym is.

Abbreviation & Acronym: Which brings us to this. Initials only form an acronym if they make a word that can be pronunced. For example, PIN, APEC, OPEC, MINDEF. Abbreviations are shortened forms of words or phrases sometimes followed by a punctuation Ms., Dr., etc., e.g.

Forte: Should be pronunced as "fort" (one syllable) not "for-tay". The two syllable pronunciation has been possibly influenced by the the music term forte in Italian.

Nuclear: Pronunced as "noo-klee-er" not "new-clear"

Revert back: There is no such thing as revert back. When you revert, you go back.

Irregardless: Irregardless is considered nonstandard and should be only used in casual writing. It is considered illogical to combine two negatives ir-prefix and -less suffix in a single term.

Alumni, Criteria, Data, Media, Agenda: Plural nouns. Singular: alumnus, criterion, datum, medium, agendum.

Angst: I remember a friend used this word in the following context "When I was a teen, I was full of angst." There and then, I thought angst means anger as young people have the tendency to be angry with the world as they grapple with identity crisis, relationship issues and biological changes. I was wrong. Angst means anxiety, usually accompanied by sadness. I'm experiencing angst about graduating from university. I'm worried that I won't find a good job and I'm sad to leave my friends behind.

Hear & Listen: Listening requires effort. Hearing is a passive activity. I know you can hear me but sometimes I think you're not listening to me.

Choice & Option: Choice implies broadly the freedom to choose from a set. Option is about a choice between only 2 possibilities. If you need to decide between A and B, you have 2 options but 1 choice.

For more "I never knew that" moments, see Words You Thought You Knew...1001 Commonly Misunderstood & Misused Words and Phrases by Jenna Glatzer.

My genuine answers to 10 frequently asked questions:

1) How are you?
This is the most frequently asked question which I hate answering. My response varies according to who asks and when. Most of the time, it’s just another way of saying hi so I don’t take it seriously.

2) Where do you stay?
Ice-breaker question. Highly likely the first question people would ask when they see me for the first time.

3) Are you a fresh graduate?
I get this several times and their next response would be to laugh and say “You’re very fresh!” What do they mean by that? How am I supposed to continue the conversation? Yeah I’m fresh, you’re stale?

4) Oh, then do you know so and so?
I have a few classmates working on the same floor as me. So the next question they’ll normally ask is “Oh, then you know the rest or not?” I wish I could say "No, I don't."

5) Did you apply together with the rest?
After which the subsequent question would be “Did you all apply to come here together?”
No. I wish no one I know applied to come here in the first place.

6) Where are most of your friends working at?
This is just a question to know how is the current job market. Why should I provide people with first hand information about the job market for recent graduates when I get nothing in return?

7) How long have you been here?
(My rent free period is going to be over)

8) Did you apply for this position yourself or you applied for something else and they offered you this?
Neither. If I could, I would not have applied for anything in the first place.

9) Who interviewed you?
I guess by finding out who made the decision to hire you, people get a rough idea of your degree of worth. For example, if you were interviewed by the CEO and you passed the test, it means you must be of a certain level of caliber to get selected by a high ranking person.

10) Why are you so quiet?
When the conversation comes to a deadlock, they'll ask this. It's like I have a disease or something. What's wrong with being quiet? Why do people find it a problem with being quiet and reserved? How come people never ask questions like "Why are you so noisy?" Quiet people are perceived as weak, timid and incompetent in a predominantly Western society which values boldness, ambition and confidence.