mrsjono

I know we’re 2 weeks into the New Year now and it’s rather late to be posting this. But I know I have to get this done to make the jigsaw puzzle complete. 2009 was a year of transition and change. A tough but still rewarding year.

I never believe in "you reap what you sow". There were times when I feel I've done my best but didn't get what I should deserve. So this time round, I am just thankful that all the hard work paid off. The final semester was the toughest partly cos of dissertation. The heavy workload resulted in much frustration and unhappiness as we had so little time left for each other. On top of that, I also had to cope with the passing of my grandma. With all that I had to manage, it's amazing that this was my best of the past 7 semesters. I graduated with my desired class of honours (phew) and yes finally, I'm no longer on the line.


In my card to rs on the day of his commencement, I wrote our graduation trip was so awesome it was unbeatable. The (unpleasant) surprises we stumbled upon, the rough rides we took, unfortunate events, beautiful sceneries, kind people we met and delightful delicacies we tried were without a doubt so unforgettable they have become my fondest memories in 2009. The whole experience is just totally beyond words. The 23 days in Yunnan via Chengdu was like a mini-SEP which we'll miss in time to come.


As our journey was coming to an end, I dread (still dreading) what lies ahead. I feel (present tense) very reluctant and hesistant about embarking the next phase of my life. Starting over again, adjusting to a new environment, getting used to a new way of life were just the beginning. Being responsible for your own actions, meeting your boss expectations, pre-empting what they will ask, clarifying, understanding and communicating to another party are just some of the things we'll need to manage everyday from now on. Having an income would also mean contributing a part of our salary to support our family. As I was adapting to all these changes, I'd look back and reminisce about the good old days when we need not be accountable to anyone but ourselves.

There's still loads to learn in the coming year, loans to repay, vacations to look forward to and unknown events that will be coming our way. No more economic crisis and global pandemic attacks pls.

I have never ever not once in my life received so many Christmas presents. I don't do gift exchange to begin with. The most it's one or none each year. To be frank, I hate buying gifts. It's physically and mentally exhausting. I can spend hours walking back and forth several streets, in and out dozens of malls till my feet are sore and end up with nothing. While walking, I would be thinking if the person will like the gift. What if she doesn't like it? What if he already have something similar? What if her friends have the same idea as me? Yes, I spend most of my time torturing myself about such things. Why? I want to see their faces light up when they open the wrapper. I hope to see the "Ohh...you shouldn't have!" expression. For my closest and loved ones, I have no complaints. But why would I want to go through all the distress for people I am not close to or people who can't appreciate?

It sure feels nice receiving presents. Initially when I see presents on my desk I would go "Wow, this person bothered to get me something." When the presents come to me personally along with a handshake and 'Merry Christmas!', I would go "Oh thank you!" with an apologetic look because I have nothing to give. As the number of wrapped boxes start to increase, I start to think "Ok, is this out of courtesy bcos everyone's doing it or what?" You know the thing about gifts? Once you start, you can't stop. Now I feel obliged to give back the many Christmas presents I have received. If I can choose, I'd rather not receive any presents.

Who invented Christmas presents? It's such a hassle.

Wah so pretty today. Hee
Why you wear so nice today? Going to a party later huh? No, buy liao then wear lor
Is that a new dress? The cutting looks nice. Yeah not very expensive also
Wah why you wear so nice today? Cos I'm meeting you all mah
Bluff! Haha
You should wear like that more often don't always wear shirt & jeans. Where got the last time is cos I half-day leave mah
Your camera still got battery? I want to take photo with you. Huh why?
Cos you wear very nice today mah. Haha ok

(When I reached home,)
So did anyone comment about your new dress? Ya! Many people say it's nice.
Haha, that's bcos usually you wear too ugly.
...
Hahahaha

It's been 2 months since I was really here. I've been here a couple of times over the past 2 months trying to post something but I never seem to hit the 'Publish Post' orange button. I have a number of drafts that sound like trash to me and they eventually get deleted away. I just can't pen down thoughts that have been swimming around in my head and bring my message across. What the hell is wrong with me?

It's 4 months into the job now. How am I doing? I think I'm veering off course. I've been making more and more mistakes by the day. I dwell on each mistake I made and worry about not being able to rectify it. Typical me. I start to question the purpose of doing what I'm doing everyday. Am I just going through the motion and doing something for the sake of doing? Yes. I can't seem to remember the things I've done. My mind is a total blank. I stump when asked questions. Am I learning new things everyday? No. Am I wasting my time? Yes. So what should I do next? Good question.

Policies need to be reviewed from time to time. Similarly, we need to pause, take a step back and reflect on our actions when we feel life is going downhill. Think of the possible implications before committing to an answer. When A asks B to do something and B asks me to do it, clarify with A. Stop following instructions blindly. Find out the purpose or rationale behind every request or instruction given. Predict the next move. Initiate changes. Suggest alternatives. The list goes on.

If you know me, I'm a pessimist. The glass is always half-empty. It's sunset and not sunrise at the horizon. I get chided by rs when I tell him to "look at the bright side" or "stop thinking about all the bad things" when things are not going well for him. Why? He says I'm in no position to say that when I can't do it myself. I never really figured out how to think positively. I seldom receive words of consolation or encouragement when I make mistakes or screw up. So I'm going to console myself that it's ok to make mistakes now when I'm still new. Everyone makes mistakes. If I don't make mistakes, I will not learn and grow.

A colleague once said "I psycho myself alot to continue staying in a job." I start to find this statement true...

Free gift: Free is redundant because all gifts are, by definition, free.

ATM machine & PIN number: Similarly, 'machine' and 'number' are redundant. ATM already stands for Automated Teller Machine and PIN for Personal Identification Number. Same goes for J corporation, the organization I'm at now. I guess the last word is repeated to give people an idea of what the abbreviation/acronym is.

Abbreviation & Acronym: Which brings us to this. Initials only form an acronym if they make a word that can be pronunced. For example, PIN, APEC, OPEC, MINDEF. Abbreviations are shortened forms of words or phrases sometimes followed by a punctuation Ms., Dr., etc., e.g.

Forte: Should be pronunced as "fort" (one syllable) not "for-tay". The two syllable pronunciation has been possibly influenced by the the music term forte in Italian.

Nuclear: Pronunced as "noo-klee-er" not "new-clear"

Revert back: There is no such thing as revert back. When you revert, you go back.

Irregardless: Irregardless is considered nonstandard and should be only used in casual writing. It is considered illogical to combine two negatives ir-prefix and -less suffix in a single term.

Alumni, Criteria, Data, Media, Agenda: Plural nouns. Singular: alumnus, criterion, datum, medium, agendum.

Angst: I remember a friend used this word in the following context "When I was a teen, I was full of angst." There and then, I thought angst means anger as young people have the tendency to be angry with the world as they grapple with identity crisis, relationship issues and biological changes. I was wrong. Angst means anxiety, usually accompanied by sadness. I'm experiencing angst about graduating from university. I'm worried that I won't find a good job and I'm sad to leave my friends behind.

Hear & Listen: Listening requires effort. Hearing is a passive activity. I know you can hear me but sometimes I think you're not listening to me.

Choice & Option: Choice implies broadly the freedom to choose from a set. Option is about a choice between only 2 possibilities. If you need to decide between A and B, you have 2 options but 1 choice.

For more "I never knew that" moments, see Words You Thought You Knew...1001 Commonly Misunderstood & Misused Words and Phrases by Jenna Glatzer.

My genuine answers to 10 frequently asked questions:

1) How are you?
This is the most frequently asked question which I hate answering. My response varies according to who asks and when. Most of the time, it’s just another way of saying hi so I don’t take it seriously.

2) Where do you stay?
Ice-breaker question. Highly likely the first question people would ask when they see me for the first time.

3) Are you a fresh graduate?
I get this several times and their next response would be to laugh and say “You’re very fresh!” What do they mean by that? How am I supposed to continue the conversation? Yeah I’m fresh, you’re stale?

4) Oh, then do you know so and so?
I have a few classmates working on the same floor as me. So the next question they’ll normally ask is “Oh, then you know the rest or not?” I wish I could say "No, I don't."

5) Did you apply together with the rest?
After which the subsequent question would be “Did you all apply to come here together?”
No. I wish no one I know applied to come here in the first place.

6) Where are most of your friends working at?
This is just a question to know how is the current job market. Why should I provide people with first hand information about the job market for recent graduates when I get nothing in return?

7) How long have you been here?
(My rent free period is going to be over)

8) Did you apply for this position yourself or you applied for something else and they offered you this?
Neither. If I could, I would not have applied for anything in the first place.

9) Who interviewed you?
I guess by finding out who made the decision to hire you, people get a rough idea of your degree of worth. For example, if you were interviewed by the CEO and you passed the test, it means you must be of a certain level of caliber to get selected by a high ranking person.

10) Why are you so quiet?
When the conversation comes to a deadlock, they'll ask this. It's like I have a disease or something. What's wrong with being quiet? Why do people find it a problem with being quiet and reserved? How come people never ask questions like "Why are you so noisy?" Quiet people are perceived as weak, timid and incompetent in a predominantly Western society which values boldness, ambition and confidence.

The inevitable came and I finally crossed over to the dark side.

I've been wailing non-stop about being pushed over the line by an invisible force. I never wanted to part with freedom and I dread what's to come.

As I drag my feet over the line, with it comes greater responsibilities, more uncertainties, and lesser friends. As I join many others in moving up the corporate ladder, will I be consumed by greed, materialism and hypocrisy? I'm afraid. I don't want to become a person I don't like and don't want to be.

Hey it wouldn't be as bad as you think, my friends would say. I don't know. I don't know how much or how long people would ponder before they begin the next phase. It struck me that I can no longer be an innocent kid. It saddens me that I'm no longer under the protection of the invisible force which has mapped out the past 16 years for us. It scares me that no one is going to draw out the remaining roadmap for me anymore.

Like everyone else, I know I'll be lost for awhile before I get used to a new lifestyle and a new environment. Meanwhile, I'll just trudge along with reluctance...

You look at the scratch and completely miss the diamond.
Raphie Frank

普达措国家公园·香格里拉

I looked up at the rainbow of balloons and confetti coming down, landing gently on my head. I couldn't feel any joy, only sorrow and reluctance. The day I wish would never come was over. It all happened in a whirl. Except for that 10 seconds walk across the stage to get the scroll which felt like eternity. 16 years of education ended with a bang, followed by balloons and streamers, smiles and hugs, and lots of flashlight.

没有爸爸妈妈 我不会有今天

I spent a long time thinking about my years here. When I sat alone in the same auditorium as a freshman, I had no idea what to expect in the coming years. Little did I know I would cross paths with so many people and walk away with so many fond memories that would last me for a lifetime.


Orthodontics changed my life forever, in far more significant ways than I imagined. For this I am eternally grateful to my dentist for giving me this powerful thing called confidence. The initial years were not that great but I met these people who have made those days more bearable.

Remember the times we giggled uncontrollably in front of our screens during wee hours on msn?

最难忘的不是现在, 而是从前那简单疯狂永远都回不去的时光

我们的开心果 很快就用完的电池

Mm ji dim gai, lam hei yi qin zi yau ngor dei liong gor dei yat zi dou geh hou siew geh hoi sam

I have walked out of those depressing days completely :)

We share one common interest and that is beautiful Shangrila. I think Mr Yee is cool and handsome!

I'm amazed by her continuous efforts to save the earth

With her around I have less to worry about

Cos she's organized, motivated and efficient!

The once in a lifetime opportunity that I never regret going. My days in Beijing were not exactly the best times but I seriously miss all the freedom and carefreeness that allowed me to be truly myself. Exchange was a turning point for I still believe many things changed after that. Be it my relationship with other people, other people's relationship with other other people. Not that it matters now anyway.

人与人之间的关系真是奇妙

He never fails to tell the story of my hostility towards him when we first met

Everyone remembers her as Ms Gorgeous now but I actually prefer the times when she could simply be herself

We've been on one of the tallest building in Singapore together

Hilarious giant and thunderous laughter

My most memorable times with him is none other than acting alongside him as a disgruntled seller

Helluva talented singer. I'm not surprised if he becomes a superstar one day!

周董上身

默契十足的芒果日报

The unforgettable times were going through some of the toughest times together

无价的表情-维持多年的长距离友情

Not forgetting my best friend who has always been there no matter happy or sad, angry or disappointed

永远没完没了的吵吵闹闹

My best times with him were not in school neither in Singapore. They were getting lost in Beijing, surviving a typhoon in Hong Kong, confronting rude people in Macau, climbing in Kunming, cycling in Dali, vommitting in Shangrila, checking our final results in Lijiang and eating hotpot in Chengdu.

The process of learning has been fun, enjoyable and memorable with the company of all these friends I've met here. I suppose this last photo celebrates the many hours we've spent on those endless projects, some of the excellent reports we've done and the end of countless nerve-wrecking exams we've sat for. As we move on with our own lives, stay close and don't fade away.

*Phone rings

Job interview??! (Nervous)

Hello?

"Hello Mam, this is (didn't catch the name) calling from HSBC"

(Chey make my heart beat so fast for nothing)

"Do u have any (blank out) with Hong Kong Shanghai Bank?"

No

Oh that's great mam, bcos we're having a credit card promotion...(blank out) U can enjoy free...(blank out) not only that we also have (blank out) exclusive 2 nights (blank out) And then u can also enjoy free movie tickets at Golden Village (no need I can watch free movie online blank out) Blank out blank out I heard some KFC & Pizzahut blank out some more while she continued speaking ever so slowwwwwwwly. . . . . .

I placed my phone on the table and let her continue talking.

The phone call duration lasted for 1min 30s before she hung up herself.

罕见的五彩缤纷

If not for my teacher, I would have been locked behind bars in Changi Prison and expelled from society forever. It was this teacher who guided me and brought me back to shore.

I was over-protected as a child and this has cultivated a stubborn and rebellious streak in me. In school, I tried to attract the attention of my schoolmates and teachers by doing everything against their wishes. I was despised and regarded as a problem kid.

All that I have done has something to do with my family background. As my parents are both busy working, they neglected me. They forgot about my birthdays and this disappointed me. They felt that material comforts could cure the loneliness in my heart and so they showered me with endless luxury. Even if my teacher called home or paid a visit to inform them about my poor conduct, they would just to their best to shield me. They trusted me and never interfered in my activities. This may seem attractive to adolescents but I really wished that they would spend more time trying to understand me and not put so much emphasis on their jobs.

However, this changed when I was in secondary school. I met Mrs Heng and she really had an impact on me. This teacher knew about my record but never discriminated against me. She paid extra attention and was strict towards me. Her care and love really touched me and was what I needed.

This teacher had a great influence on me as she never let me off for my offences. As I was pampered at home, I really needed someone to discipline me. I remembered that I tried to cheat in my exams by amending the answer after she had returned me the marked script. She was very sharp and realised it at once. She did not question me but just informed me that she will not disregard the marks I had obtained, but that would have to meet my parents.

I did not know what they discussed but after the meeting, my parents changed completely. They were convinced that money could not buy love and realised that all that I had done was out of desparation for their love. Since then, they have spent more time with me and paid more attention to me. I am very grateful to Mrs Heng for letting my parents know about my feelings.

Although I was punished for breaking the school rules, I learned a lesson more valuable than a chest of treasure. I finally understood that all my foolish actions were of no help. I ought to spend more time understanding my parents. Only through two-way communication can a bond be developed. Mrs Heng, thank you very much.

I know I'm home when I can't afford anything here. Even when it's the GSS. Don't you think it's all a scam? Those on sale are either outdated, old-fashioned apparel or second hand goods. New arrivals are hardly on sale. Even if they are, the most it's just a meagre 10% off. Which is like a dollar or two off a normal $20 shirt. It's back to pauper status in Singapore. Sigh.

To reward ourselves for all the possible reasons we could think of, we spent the last 4 days sleeping past noon, shopping and eating! Such indulgence is a luxury for me bcos I'm a poor student in expensive Singapore.

Oh yes KFC never tasted so good. On the day of the release of results, we were so nervous and had no mood to do anything so we went to eat KFC. Ajisen again in Chengdu and local snacks (bottom row-冰粉、凉面、龙抄手) in Wenshu Monastery. Nice!

Bulk of my harvest were from Lijiang. Wallet, bags, scarf, stamps, dongba postcards, dongba art painting, a drawing, wild fungi, dried plums, dragon beard candy which became a lump of rock and I had to dump both boxes down the chute.

What better way to celebrate our results than having good food? 正宗麻辣火锅 & Pizzahut! The lean beef and soup base for the hotpot were irresistable! Shiok!

Another bulk of my harvest from Chengdu. We discovered a 五道口服装市场 which was enough to last me a few hours. More souvenirs from Wenshu Monastery, a big box of tidbits from the supermarket and a final last glance at Tianfu Square before heading to the airport.

Why are we smiling when we're going home? :'(

Upon arrival at Chengdu Airport, there were lots of people to welcome us. Wow, we're popular!

We didn't like Panba so we decided to stay at Naxi Mama when we return to Lijiang from Shangrila. It's on the outskirts of the old town and we had problems finding it. We were walking up and down the street with our bags and out of nowhere, a middle-aged lanky man asked where we were going. We thought he's a tout and ignored him. The man kept asking and my donkey friend flared up and told him to go away. We went off down another alley and back again to the same street where the man was. I showed him the name card I was holding in my hand and he immediately said "I know where, follow me." It was his house. He was Naxi Baba, the owner of the guesthouse we were going to stay at.

As the bus weaved its way through the mountain roads, I rocked to the beat of the music playing in my ears. How strange, for I usually find myself skipping almost every song that comes up on the player. Then I started singing aloud, totally immersed in my own world and it felt like the most enjoyable ride I ever had.

I stared out of the window looking at the vast lands and clear skies whizzed past me in a blur of green, brown and blue. While I'm really looking forward to KFC in Lijiang having deprived of real food for days and getting overdosed by all those mountains, I know eventually I'll miss the rugged natural terrains here. I discovered I've taken a liking to the sense of remoteness and sacredness I found in Shangrila. And I am truly in awe with all the good people we met.

I may be back for all I know, but until then it's goodbye with great reluctance.

RS LOST HIS HANDPHONE

After a longer than expected journey up to Feilaisi, we've finally come to the last destination of the entire trip. Big sigh from me, I'm running outta steam trying to post all of these. Anyway, the previous few photos you see were painstakingly taken by me as I forced myself to get out of the vehicle while trying to avoid shitting in my pants for 10 hours cos I don't want to miss out on anything after travelling miles to come to Mount Meili.

The only hotel we stayed in throughout our trip. It's a 3-star hotel (all hotels in Feilaisi are 3-star) recommended by the waitress we met in Lijiang who worked here last time. Too luxurious for me though, I don't need the carpet, chairs, dressing table and bathtub but we decided to spend the money to have a comfortable stay after a long journey here. Same price (160 yuan) as Sim's Cosy but service was a far cry from the latter. Double room can go as low as 130 yuan. So bargain!

We almost got a free night's stay in this room cos no one asked us to pay. I had wanted to take off quickly while rs was feeling bad about it when we were caught by the female owner who shouted "Have you guys paid the rent???!" from the window at the second floor lol.







After a disappointing early morning, the pack got onto the vehicle and headed to Mingyong, where there's a massive glacier at the foot of Kagebo Peak. During the 1.5hrs, the Hongkie (someone in the pack, who has visited this place umpteen times he knows the people in the village) kept complaining about the driver (who also runs a guest house in Yubeng) blasting music in the guest house and disturbing the peacefulness of the village. Quite hilarious listening to their conversation when half the time, I couldn't understand the driver's broken Chinese but the Hongkie does and just keep firing at him.

Risk is the best

Mingyong Glacier is fast retreating due to climate change. All that ice below comes from the melted snow from Kagebo. It's a tough climb up...took us 4 hours to go round and round the mountain along horse shit trails. All that shit has produced very pretty flowers that I've never seen before. Look at that silly animal on the bottom right hand corner chewing on a plastic bag! Haa!

Intrigued by the formation of blue ice

Yan Yan, Ling Long, Me & Jia Bao

You may be wondering, where's the food section? We didn't eat any real, solid food. Hmm except for the two oily fried eggs from the hotel that cost a freaking 6 yuan. Otherwise, it was junk all the way for 3 consecutive days. Cup noodles, chips, chocolates, pasteries and whatever we had brought up here. I had enough of food poisoning attacks!